Oh, lordy lord, I have
to go,
For nature's calling me,
I have to go so bad, so bad,
Oh me, oh my, oh me.
I have to find the
toilet room,
I asked, I really tried,
But no one seemed to understand,
I hung my head and cried.
I asked a
man,
"Where is the John?"
He said, "My name is
Fred."
I
thought,
"If I don't find the Loo,
I may just end up dead."
I saw a lady walking
by,
And asked,
"Is there a
Can?"
She said, "I could,
but really can't,
That's not the girl I am."
"I need to
find a Crapper, man,"
He looked from side to
side,
"The drugs I sell are Speed and Pot,
To buy, you need to hide."
"A Pot,
that's what I need to find,
(But not the kind you sell),
You know where I can find the Head?"
He grinned at me
....... oh well !
I walked up to a
gentleman,
"You know a
WC?"
"Let's see, I know a
WB,"
Oh right, I think that's me."
I need to find a
Washroom or,
A Restroom or Commode,
I'd even use an Outhouse Throne,
Like in the days of old.
The army base is
straight ahead,
I know they have latrines,
But when I asked the guard in charge,
He thought I said canteen.
I'm desperate now;
it's much too late,
I have to find a Pisser,
But when I asked the punk outside,
He punched me in the kisser.
When I awoke I felt
a warm
And strange humidity,
But I am also much at peace,
No longer have to pee.
by
David Ronald Bruce Pekrul
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